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hopeful holds the tension/ dew jewels cling the sway/ clasped tight against the world/ not yet knowing it's ok/ the waiting deepens color/ trying to accept every sun ray/ gathering its truth song/ beauty at bay so long/ awaiting opening to day/

Monday, August 17, 2009

The Headache of getting "nothing" (out of "too much") done

(I can't help thinking that this is how families are supposed to be. Maj-britt (the wife) called Clinton to discuss something about dinner and he asked to talk to both of his children - including the 12 week-old. THIS is why good men are important. And, actually, for the first time EVER, really, I actually felt a brief desire to have children myself someday (but that's another subject entirely, isn't it?))
Anyway, I didn't really do a lot today, though there is much to be done. I took a bit of a walk to the library and around the cute little town of Clackmannan (about 25 miles outside Edinburgh) where I'm staying. Then, I attempted to get caught up on some journaling, reading, writing, photo-labeling and planning for the various things to do for the next 6 days before I begin my pilgrimage. There's a lot to do to prepare for that, as well as a lot to see on this (the East) side of Scotland, like the biggest festival (they've got a lot of free shows and some of them - excluding the "Heresy: Kill Your God" show - look really good!) and seeing a lot of castles. I've not finished nearly as much as I want to, and I've got a bit of a dull headache, but it's ok; I feel like I'm working through a lot, even if it doesn't APPEAR I'm not getting a lot "done."
I'm SO grateful for the healthy food - they grow their own seasonings and spices on their kitchen table (like basil, parsley and thyme) and have really inspired me to begin doing the same (provided I find a place to live in Seattle when I return!) and the fellowship here, and for the ability to not "get a lot done" and FINALLY not feel guilty about not doing enough or accomplishing enough. Despite my best efforts to not learn how to "rest"/"relax" and "let go and let God", I think I'm actually (finally!) learning how to do this. Actually, there are an incredible amount of changes (despite the incredible challenges) going on...which is why there is so much to journal, chronicle and document. Oh, and I discovered that I am actually rather possessive of Mr. Waffles (my teddy bear, for those that don't know...) today...:-P.

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