London's Highlights

So, I didn't get to Big Ben (although, according to my little brother, that is how/where the universe began) or Westminster Abbey, but I'm actually alright with that. I am not a tourist; I wanted to see what my heart would have me do out here, and so, I spent most of the on day Friday at Hyde Park, reading, and praying. I actually started reading and really enjoying the Bible (that would be a first for me!)

I wandered around the city, a bit, too, because I needed to exchange an old bank note a friend gave me (from her trip to England 12 years ago) for a new one - they are, despite their obsession with spending money, rather finicky about it. A lot of stores wouldn't take the pounds I got in Northern Ireland because they had a bank stamp on them that was not, technically, English. I was all, "I'm trying to give you MONEY - YOUR money - and you won't take it!" Weird. But anyway...that night, Marta and I had, apparently, some girlyness to get out of our system. We painted our nails and she dyed my hair...purple!
We went out with some of her friends to Canary Wharf in East London, which is, apparently a rough-and-tumble part of London; to start off the trip, a group of people - two girls and a guy had a bottle of Bacardi, Jack and Coke on the Tube and were pouring themselves (and anyone who wanted some) drinks and singing dreadfully out of tune to the one iPod they had between them, ocassionally attempting to switch listeners by trading the earpiece.
We had dinner at another YWAM leader and went out to celebrate a birthday - "traditional English" style - which means going to a really posh (upscale) bar and ordering even more posh drinks (here "posh" means "unpronouncable") and sitting around talking about politics or other people's business. Marta and I talked about church. (Sometimes I wonder who I am becoming - seriously, three years ago next month I would never have dreamed of doing any of this - not only was I scared out of my mind to deviate from the path I thought I was supposed to be following, but I was one of those people who was "never going to become a Christian").
On Saturday, I walked up and down the Portobello Road Market - which is like a crazed version of the U-District Street Fair. I usually LOVE the Street Fair, but this was WAY too overwhelming and hyped up. I did enjoy seeing Portobello Road and I found more falafel for lunch! I found a part of the Road that was calm - except for the bright colors - but I LOVE that they find freedom enough to do that here. It sort of reminded me of Seattle, and how they've splashed art of many forms all over the city. I love it! Denver - where I'm from - didn't do that, and I wonder if part of the tight-cornered, smooth-haired way I've lived with all these "rules" (about how to live, what to do, how to make decisions, even about what to wear) either real or perceived, stems, partly from that. I mean, I am AMAZED at the freedom people have here! It's really causing a relax-all-out in me that I never knew to even hope for! So now, I just want to say (this is surprising even myself!), "Ahhhhhh." (Taken rather prophetically the first day I was in London having just met Carrie and found these AWESOME chairs!)

I also spent more time in reflection, journaling and writing - which is something I've regrettably not made time for in the past. That is one of the joys of not having a super-packed vacation - I have a lot of free time to really explore the inward journey that hopefully is cataylized in this rather spontaneous outward journey.

When I first arrived in London, I did NOT want to be there. But, with all this introspection, I've come up with a comforting and important discovery: that is the same reaction I have to most things that are new. I'm sort of like a cat - I hate change and am resistant to it no matter what it is because I just want things to be safe (as in, the same) no matter how miserable I am. This has caused me to never be where I want to be, and never want to be where I am. But that, by the grace of God, is changing. It's not like I made a Decision to change it, it just has started. I spent the first few nights here just wanting to go home, and the first night in London wanting to go back to Northern Ireland. I also spent a lot of time freaking out about wasting my life and realized that rejecting where I am at present (most of the time as a result of the decisions I have made) is in fact doing the very thing I fear. You see, I would spend all the time I had at a certain place or with a certain person not wanting to be there and then missing it or them like crazy when it was over - it really made no sense. So now, I have to say, I am really enjoying myself out here, and am glad I've got the rest of the summer for this. Thank You Lord Jesus - for this was surely nothing I did on my own, or even at my own initiative (which is another really dear thing to me!).